Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Good Riddance Denver!!

I arrived in Denver last Wednesday and was so very happy to see my mother again. My sister was there also.

I wrote a lengthy post in a word processor, debating if I should share with my readers everything that transpired during my visit. It was not pretty. I was unable to copy and paste it and decided that it was meant to be kept private.

I will tell you that my mother's surgery went very well. Unfortunately, my mom became abusive, furious at my father for leaving when I was only three years old and wanted me to leave when I became upset and told her to stop. She survived three other husbands who were very good to her. She is under a tremendous amount of stress, having to make very important living decisions and is unable to do so and will not let anyone help her. She is 89, but age is not an excuse as she has been this way most of her life.

The third day I was there I freaked out when this happened.

There were warnings for our area and my mom doesn't have a cellar to her home for protection. There were five separate tornadoes and one touched down and hit a shopping mall, overturning cars and tractor trailers along the way. I ran to a neighbors for help.

A phone number scrolled across the screen but I was not able to capture it in time. By calling the number and listing your own phone number, you will be contacted if it is your neighborhood that is in immediate danger as opposed to a county. I also learned that the town has a siren to warn people and the police cruisers will drive up and down the streets to alerting residents.

Most people laughed that I was so scared. I'm told this is a normal occurrence. Sorry, I'll take my winter snow storms and stay safely indoors with homemade soup.

Can you see the tornado in the upper right of the picture?

This hail was minor. Some areas had baseball size hail.

So, when mom started to call a relative and complain that I was not caring for her properly, that was the last straw. I did everything I could. I called her eye doctor because she was not taking her glaucoma drops, spoke to her other doctors about various issues, took her to visit friends, cooked, was up with her during the night and never complained. So, I decided my sister could take over. She just returned from her vacation. I left...........
Continental had a 1 1/2 hr. delay leaving Denver, more delays leaving Newark. It was a very turbulent flight and a scary landing.
I'm happy to be back home.


  1. Sounds like the worst tornado was your mom. Those are quite the pictures there, though! My folks had a tornado throw major tree trunks throughout their house once--it's not minor stuff.

    Glad you went, glad you helped, glad you did some good even when it was hard to do.

  2. So sorry your trip turned out this way. I know you had pretty high hopes.

    But it sounds like there wasn't really anything you could have done to make it turn out any differently.

    Trust that you did what you could for her and you.

  3. I'm glad you got to go see your mom, even tho it didn't go well (and I'm so sorry for that), when the time comes that your mom passes on, you will not have any regrets and that will give you some comfort instead of guilt along with her loss. I'm glad you made it home and that you are where love and want to be. :)

  4. Oh Joansie,
    Just got in from a night walk on the beach and checked in here.
    I am so sorry you had this experience with your Mom.Sounds like your Mom is not happy with herself therefore she makes others around her miserable.
    you went to see her ,at great cost to your self , and you did what she would let you do & then some. You can sleep at night ,with yourself because you gave what you could.
    I hate that this is the memory you will have of your Mom but you must try to put the hurt behind you,as time will allow.
    I am glad you are home safe..
    Elsie <><

  5. I've been to Denver multiple times, sometimes in summer camping and hiking and sometimes to ski in the winter months. Love it there. Think it's one of the prettiest places I've ever been too. It's where hubby and I wanted to move when we were first married; but didn't due his mother's health and his being an only and his father being gone. I've actually never heard of them having tornado's. Snow and hail yes, been there during; but wow.........your pictures.

    Sorry things with Mom were difficult. They were a bit with my Mom too before she died. But, aging is hard and people fight it, and they fight giving up control and some of it, they truly can't help. The last several months of Mom's life were horrible and the few sparking moments were frankly when she was being argumentative. Thats when we thought for a short moment there was hope she might make it. The stubborness can serve them well. Try to hang in there, the alternative isn't well......none of it is easy or good or positive.

    Truly, I understand. Whoever said The goldensyears needs to have someone hit them with a baseball bat. Cause there's nothing golden about them.


  6. welcome home- dealing with family is never pretty in most cases. Tornados are never pretty especially closeby I've only ever seen 2 in NJ ... I'll be working the state show for the next 3 days 10-5 or later *sigh*

  7. Joansie, I wish you were able to report a more pleasant trip, but I am glad you got to see your mother, and I am glad you are home safe and sound.

  8. Wow you got a great pic of it.Im gald you are home too. Yes I will take the snow any day.
    Enjoy being home

  9. Aw Joansie. I was so hoping this trip would have a better ending. You've had such a rough life with this.
    As for the tornados, welcome to my world. When we lived on the farm,a tornado tore off our barn doors, and picked up our tractor and set it down ,down the road. It completley leveled a whole town.

  10. Oh Sweety,
    Mothers are never easy. At least now you are home, in a tornado free zone (scary pics!) amongst people who love you.

    Lots of Cyber hugs.

  11. Moms...can't live with 'em and ya can't live with 'em....

  12. Your latest blog entry has given me a lot to think about. I feel for you. Such a mixture of guilt and anxiety.

    To switch to another topic - are you the one who likes lighthouses? If so, I have a postcard to send you.

    Janet in Dublin

  13. Sorry to hear your visit with your mom turned out in the way it did. I pray that you will be able to push this memory to the side and remember only the good times you shared with your mom in the past. Did not realize Denver had tornados. Thank goodness you all were safe. Sounds like it is time for you to pick up your yarn and relax.